In a Pinch: Who's the Boss?

 

I got cute kids. Yes it's true, they are in fact adorable.  There is simply no denying it. Don't get me started talking about them because you'll have a hard time shutting me up. I have started 2 websites and have over 200 GB of digital photos dedicated to the pair. So yeah, I kinda like them.  But even the cutest of kids can be a giant pain in the ass at times.

Gabe, my 5 year old (just turned 5 in October) started kindergarten this fall.  He is on the young side, as he was only 4 when the year started and there are some 6 year olds in the class.  My wife and I debated back and forth for a long time about whether to wait a year or go ahead and start him this year. Well we obviously went ahead with kindergarten. Sometimes when you are a parent you feel like no matter what decision you make it is the wrong one - but that's another article.

 
He looks like he is up to something doesn't he?

When he started there were some behavior issues, attention issues and some skill issues. The school has worked with us and Gabe has made some tremendous progress.  I am very proud of how hard he is working and how well he is doing.  Back when I was in kindergarten my day was full of coloring, napping and eating paste.  Expectations of current kindergartners is much higher as Gabe has nightly homework and I think I heard he will be starting algebra next week.

Well this last week a new problem arose: pinching.  It seems at lunch and recess Gabe has taken to pinching (not hard, but still)- and apparently one girl in particular (we'll call her Jane).  Jane is in Gabe's class and he just can't seem to keep his hands to himself.  It did not take us long to figure out that Gabe has a 5 year old version of a crush on Jane.  At first we just told him to knock it off - but he didn't.  Then after a few more detailed discussions with Gabe he indicated that he thought he could not control his actions, he was almost compelled to pinch her. He said he should just sit on the bench at recess so he wouldn't pinch her. 

He simply felt out of control. We told him that he WAS in fact in control- HE was the boss.  He got to decide what actions he took. He did not have to pinch her, he could ask her if she wanted to play instead. This can be a tough concept for a 5 year old to grasp and as it turns out, a tough one for adults too.

Many people I work with feel they are unable to control themselves in one way or another.  Some will say they know that they just will not work out, and others simply say they will not follow the nutrition plan.   Bad nutrition is the biggest reason people fail to see results on any type of fitness program. A colleague of mine put it this way: You cannot out train bad nutrition.

Whether you eat too much, eat too little or eat junk - it all adds up to the same thing: Bad nutrition. But here is the thing that most people miss, and it is so simple : YOU ARE THE BOSS.

It has nothing to do with this I assure you

Who's the Boss? - That'd be you.  You get to decide what you  eat, when you eat, if you should eat etc.  No one is forcing you to eat at the McDonalds drive through. No one is forcing a feed bag of Doritos around your neck at TV time.  That vat of ice cream did not get out of the freezer on its own.  You get to choose what goes in you and when.  And don't give me that "I have no time" BS.  We all have the same 24 hours in the day, so plan accordingly.

The sooner you accept the fact that you have the ability to control your eating, your fitness and your life, the sooner you will be on the true path to health and happiness.  And be clear on this point: no one will do it for you.  You are the boss - you make the decisions.

Gabe has figured it out, at least for now. There was no pinching today.  And he is only 5. The last thing we told him as we kissed him goodbye this morning was that he was the boss. I will happily tell you the same anytime - but don't expect a kiss.

 

Joshua Carter
The Body Transformation Expert
Carter Fitness
http://carterfitness.com/
818-337-6175